Belaruda's+HD

This is an over 200 year old Historical Document of an excerpt from Queen Clarisa's Journal. This was the excerpt that was found by a worker and is what started the Civil War in Belaruda that led to the government and way of life that is known today.

5th day of The Time of Renewal, Year 10

Dear Journal,

I cannot take this anymore. I am tired of being his follower, his sidekick, his anything! I have never been able to love him in the way wives are supposed to love their husbands. How could I when I was arranged into the marriage without a say? I will admit he is a great king among the colony, but I do not like having to act like this perfect wife who loves her King ungraciously. I want to be able to make my own decisions, starting with who I love, and right now, I love Isandro. I met him while I was taking a stroll in the forest and he was hunting on his own, which was seen as unlawful in our colony because it made it appear the a hunter was being greedy. He bowed before me, begging me not to punish him or let the King know. When I looked into his beautiful green eyes I nearly melted, and immediately told him not to worry, but to walk with me in the forest instead. That walk soon turned into several secret walks in the forest together, and our conversations bloomed a friendship and then something more. I cannot express how happy I feel in his presence. How I wish I were a mere helper amongst the colony instead of the Queen to the King. Maybe then I could decide who I could marry, and I would certainly choose Isandro. Oh how I love him unconditionally and how I wish we did not have to keep our relationship a secret. I am trying to plan some kind of escape to run away with him. I know this sounds crazy, but I need to get away from here, from him. I want to be where I can make my own decisions. I want to be with Isandro, and not just amongst the forest on our secret walks. This must be kept a secret for now. All of it. No one is to know how I really feel, especially the King. It would mean disastrous consequences if he were to find out. This is between me and you journal. No one else is to find out.

~Clarisa